Before this shit even starts, Ramona best to not work our fucking nerves this season like she did in Season 1!!
Aww shit! They came out the gate with drama. Evidently, Simon said some negative shit about Jill to New York Magazine– talkin about she’s from Long Island….and it shows! Well, Jill being the hot-headed New Yorker that we love, talked to Cindy Adams about it and busted Simon and Alex asses out. We cannot stand Simon and Alex. They are fucking freaks! Ramona has the nerve to be judgmental saying she’d never talk shit to a newspaper! Bullshit! She knows damn well that she talks shit while the cameras are rolling. What the fuck is the difference between people watching the trash talk on TV vs. reading it in the Post?
Wannabe NY socialites Simex are self-proclaimed Hamptons haters, yet these two assholes and their bad ass kids rented a home there for the summer! They are so pathetic and desperate, for real. The outside of the home is a total fucking dump! The inside is, um, full of character! It’s cool, but the outside could use some damn work. What we wanna know is how the fuck does the General Manager of a boutique hotel make that much damn money?
They go from that dump to LuAnn’s home in the Hamptons. Talk about night and day. Anyway, Jill fills LuAnn in on the Simex drama. Of course Countess Lu puts her proper spin on how Jill should behave in the future. Hollywood loves LuAnn; Vine can’t wait for her to have an etiquette breakdown!
Jill and Bethenny hit a Hamptons party that is “so pedestrian” according to Jill’s gay husband. They see wannabes Simex. Jill is the bigger bitch so she approaches them. Everything was squashed.
Meanwhile, Ramona and her husband go out for dinner and discuss how they think Simon is either gay or bi-sexual! Wouldn’t that be some shit? Gotta love how the New York bitches go hard!
New housewife Kelly is just a renaissance bitch ain’t she? Mother, equestrian, author, model, socialite, party girl…The verdict is still out on her, but so far we ain’t in love with her.
Bethenny in that bikini! Work bitch, WORK!
Moving on to Jill’s barnyard fundraiser. Countess Lu was supposed to drop off her rug rats to help stuff gift bags, but she never showed or called. How is she writing a book on manners and etiquette, but does some foul shit like that to a friend? Jill is better than us cuz we sho nuff woulda called her ass on it! Why do they tip toe around Countess Lu?
Ramona’s crazy ass is there. New girl in school Kelly made her entrance wearing a mu mu lookin like she was about to hit a luau on the big island. Countess Lu introduced her to the housewives she didn’t know. Ramona talked this bitch’s ear off about fuckin kids! I mean, we get it, ya’ll have kids, but damn! Surely with how fabulous you muthafuckas are supposed to be, you could find some other shit to discuss besides kids and damn shoes!
Simex made their entrance. Those two just make our skin crawl. Why? Cuz they’re the type of assholes who will do any and everything to get to a certain rung on the ladder, preferably the top rung! Those types are disgusting to H&V. Shit, just be you and let the chips fall where they may dumb asses.
Pretty boring toward the end. Looks like it’s gonna be a great season.
In a minute…