Where Reality Meets Rhapsody

Awww, what better way to start off my Monday afternoon than a new episode of For the Love of Ray J.  In honor of Danger being exposed as a tramp today, I’ve poured myself a nice Vodka Cranberry in order to truly enjoy the festivities!

Here’s what I wanna know.  Does Uniqua not see her tits sagging when she looks in the mirror? 

Cocktail went into Ray’s room and was about to get a good forward cowgirl rhythm going on Ray’s lap when Danger interrupted!  She is so mentally unstable that I can’t even explain what just happened.  Only thing I caught was that she told Ray that she “degradated” herself earlier in the day!  DEGRADATED!!

Ray just told the Trashy Three that they’re meeting granny today!  This should be a disaster!  His Godsister, Tracy and cousin are there, too.  Tracy is acting like Ray is as famous as George Clooney sayin’ how if they win, they’ll have to deal with groupies on a bigger level than the show.  What groupies?  Flavor Flav had better lookin’ bitches on his show than Ray!  Just sayin…

They asked Danger what inspired the tat on her face.  She didn’t answer the question, but she did get up out her seat in order to give granny a close up of the tiger.  Granny clowned her ass talkin’ about she didn’t see a tattoo.  Translation…all I see is that your ass was dumb enough to get permanent ink on your face!

On to some billiards place with all of Ray’s friends and the Triflin’ Three.  Every time we see Unique in that pink Earth, Wind & Fire’s guitarist blazer, take a drink of something!  Trust, it’ll make this shit more interesting.  She clearly spent all her money on that Louis Vuitton luggage set and can’t afford another blazer!? 

Unique has obvious become delusional cuz she’s putting Ray’s friends to sleep talkin’ about her nonexistent career as a “correspondent”, but she thought their chemistry was off the hook! 

In walks Tom Green!  He asked Cocktail out for sushi or Korean BBQ if she doesn’t win.  She accepted AND shook on it.  Unique was smart enough to turn him down!  How the fuck dumb can you be?

Danger is gettin’ hemmed up by the homies!  She admitted to meeting Ray’s “producer”, but it was nothing to her. 

Ray gets rid of the girls and talks to his friends for input.  They all seem to like Cocktail.  Nobody said shit about Unique.  They were probably like you chunky, titty saggin’ light skinned girl, you’re too fucking square for Ray’s freaky, big dick ass!  Sorry, the vodka made me say it.

They were gettin’ on Danger for having fucked Ray’s “producer”, but his personal assistant stuck up for her!  She had a good point.  How did Danger know that the nigga was Ray’s “producer” when she fucked him hella long before the show was even a thought?!  But the cold shit was when Tom Green started a chant and the rest of the group joined in.  It went a lil somethin like this:

DANGER, SHE SMASHED THE HOMIE!  DANGER, SHE SMASHED THE HOMIE!  DANGER, SHE SMASHED THE HOMIE!  That was probably the funniest thing Tom Green has ever said or done!  Ray covered his head in shame!

Ray is now talkin’ to Lil B about who she thinks is right for him.  She thinks Danger is the one who is most there for him!  All these muthafuckas have a skewed vision cuz none of these broads are good for Ray.

These hoes just came in from gettin’ grilled by the homies, now they have to meet Mama (and Papa) Norwood in 2 hours.  This won’t be pretty.  Anybody wit a pulse knows that Mama Norwood is a bitch!  Look at Ray’s slick wit it father with his bluetooth in his ear.  Old people figure out how to use one device and don’t let it go!  Is that a wave noveau on Mama Norwood?

They’re each tellin’ his folks why they like Ray.  All three are layin’ it on thick!  Oh wait a minute, Ray is like leanin’ on his mama’s shoulder like a 5 year old.  This nigga is a mama’s boy!  Oh Lord, he’s short AND a mama’s boy!  These bitches need to run in the other direction, for real!

Mama Norwood requested a 1 on 1 with each of the Tacky Three.  Unique is up first!  WAIT A MINUTE…Unique just told her that she does not drink!  Please tell me I am not the only one who saw Uniqua tossin’ back wine that night tryna get Fiesty drunk?  This is a cold bitch baby!  Of course, she just threw Danger under the bus!

Cocktail is up next.  She sounds like a sprung school girl!  She just ain’t smart and it’s showing!  Oh, she just found the words to articulate her thoughts…when it came time to trash Danger.  Dayum, Danger can’t win!

Last and least is Danger’s ass!  She walked up to Mama Norwood cryin’.  She is a fuckin’ emotional wreck.  She plays such the victim.  Look, I’m not sayin’ she didn’t have a tough upbringing.  All of us did, some more extreme than others!  But bitch you are grown.  Suck that shit up and deal with life!  Shit, get some professional help.  Save that tattoo money and pay for a shrink!

Papa Norwood’s top 3 went like 1. Danger 2. Unique 3. Cocktail.  WHAT?  DANGER FIRST?  Mama Norwood’s top 3…NO, NO AND NO LMAO!  No #1 – Danger cuz she don’t think he’d be safe with her LOL!  No #2 – Unique cuz she wouldn’t be true!  No #3 Cocktail!  She doesn’t like any of these bitches.  Uh oh, wait a minute…now Papa Norwood says no to all three of they asses, too LOL!  This shit is hilarious!  His mama said that he likes Danger cuz he’s livin’ in the moment, but 6 months from now he’ll be behind bars due to this bitch LMAO!  I can’t stop LOL.  Make it stop!  Make it stop!

WHAT do Danger and Unique have on at elimination?  Danger looks like the Muslim version of Robert Palmer’s Simply Irresistible broads!  Unique looks like a secular nun!  Ray is torn (yeah right) and can hardly spit out his decision!  So, he decides not to send any of them home.  He wants to head to their hometowns and meet their families!

Danger immediately looks worried!  Really, so does Cocktail.  The only one who looks secure is Uniqua, of course.  Aww shit, Danger starts having a panic attack and asked to be driven to the hospital!  WHY doesn’t he send this crazy bitch home?  This ain’t enough for him?

Next on the finale, Danger thinks that she and Ray love each other LMAO!  I need another drink!  She said she’s not crazy, she’s just intelligent and different!  Yeah, okay!

He’ll send one broad home before the end of the show and fly the other two to Vegas.  I think either Unique or Danger is going home first.  I think Cocktail will be safe to make it through to the finals!

Should be interesting.  Thoughts?

…Vine…in a minute

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Comments on: "For the Love of Ray J: 4/6/09 Live Blog" (1)

  1. to 4 the love of ray you need to stop looking for love and get back with danger because you know that she is pregnent with your baby.

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