Where Reality Meets Rhapsody

This morning on Good Morning America, the new Dancing w/the Stars line-up was announced!  I know half of you don’t know who half of them are.  So let’s break it down:

Aaron Carter – Pimple faced, geeky little brother of Backstreet Boy Nick Carter and the one who was laying the pipe to dating Hilary Duff & Lynsay Lohan at the same time.

Ashley Hamilton– son of over processed, sun addicted 100 years old actor George Hamilton.  He was also married for 86 days to Angie Everhart and 195 days to Shannon Doherty…real serious monogamist!

Chuck Liddell– UFC beefcake.  Snooze…

Debi Mazar – Actress and former make-up Artist for Madonna.  If she moves on the floor as little as her apparently over Botoxed face, she’ll be gone sooner than later!

Donny Osmond – Needs no introduction!  I love him.

Joanna Krupa – “model” and the broad Terrell Owens texted to call her a bitch.

Kathy Ireland – Former model, horrible actress (Melrose Place) and fierce business woman who made it okay to shop at Kmart.

Kelly Osbourne – Ozzie’s foul mouthed, wannabe singing ass daughter. They might need a 30 second delay for her ass!

Louie Vito– Hella short professional snowboarder.  Snooze..

Mark Dacascos – “The Chairman” on Iron Chef America, martial artist and actor.  ???

Mya– Lawd have mercy! Bad singer, fabulous, trained dancer, Grammy Award winning “Lady Marmalade” participant with Christina Aguilera, Pink, Lil Kim and Missy Elliott.  Now she spends her time tryna find a baller to save her since her career is on the road to nowhere!

Macy Gray – WHO THE FUCK are they gonna get to partner with this big bitch?

Melissa Joan HartSabrina the Teenage Witch star.  I like her.

Michael Irvin– Needs no introduction.  Former NFL great who battled a drug addiction and conquered it.  Ya’ll know DWTS needs at least one black athlete per season…he’s filling the quota!

Natalie Coughlin – Another quota filler.  Gold medal winning Olympian swimmer that people find attractive. 

Tom DeLay – Crooked, US House of Reps Republican who violated laws about misusing campaign funds!  Shocker.

What do ya’ll think of this season’s cast? 

…in a minute….Vine

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Comments on: "Dancing w/the Stars Fall 2009 Line-up…H & V Style" (3)

  1. Raquellykel said:

    What a hoot this cast is going to be, are you sure it not Dancing with the non-stars. Now, I think Mya might have a great chance of winning if they allow a woman of color to win. Macy Gray WTF is all I gotta say about that! I couldn’t agree more with your comments about the black athlete quota and olympian quota. ANd Chuck Liddell, he is just crazy I have seen him out before lol. Of all the people they have had on the show, this is all that they could get for this next season, there are no real name drawers other than Donny Osmond. As I keep looking at the list I feel like I want to say more but am literally at a loss for words.

  2. My money is on Donny. He’s been dancin’ on stage since he was in diapers. All the others can’t hold a candle to the life time of experience that he’s got. It’s almost unfair to the other contestants.

    I laughed my ass of when I heard about Tom Delay. This one I’m going to have to see to believe. Who’s next? Newt Gingrich?

    And Macy Gray? Really? She’s going to have a hard time getting through those numbers with her pot-smoking lungs. Same with Kelly. They’re going to have to cut their mics so we don’t hear them wheeze through the whole show.

  3. @Jen – Good point about Donny! I love him! Tom DeLay might be the WORST contestant on DWTS ever.

    I am still at a loss with Macy Gray! Who made THAT decision LOL?

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