Where Reality Meets Rhapsody

Before we get started, for those of you who don’t know, Don Vito’s lawsuit against Kizzie for “Tardy for the Party” never happened.  She paid him before he had to take it that far.  Thank you Kandi for clearing that up on Wendy Williams earlier this week.

Aight, Kizzie’s batting lead off with some fat girl who had the nerve to put a bikini on.  Kizzie ain’t right for allowing her “friend” to get on camera lookin’ like Sponge Bob Square Pants!  She said Papa treated her and the girls to a Bahamas trip so that she could relax after she got drunk and fell slipped and hurt herself at the alter ego party.  Then he flew in and surprised her.  That must be when they got that photo of the two of them together.  “I wouldn’t stay with him for the money, but…”  Who is she fooling and why is she allowing that man to spend time with her children?  Adults can do what the fuck they want, but to show your kids that bullshit?  Hell naw!  And that fat ass friend of hers telling her whatever she wants to hear is disgusting!  No that man is not the love of her life!  OMG, was that ice in her wine?  NEXT…

Sheree and her wanna be the 7th housewife (Dwight is the 6th) girlfriend are checking out the dump where her independence party is gonna be held.  This party is not hardly about women being free.  It’s about Sheree bringing attention to herself, like everything else she does in life!

Lisa and Kandi are at rehearsal for the Pocketbook Monologues…AKA the Vagina Monologues for sistas.  Lisa better not ever get into acting cuz she was horrible!  Kandi, on the other hand, was prepared and she was great!  Gotta give it to her.  But the Vagina Monologues is the coochie telling its story, not a woman telling about her kitty’s history!  Just sayin…  Leave it to Lisa to want what she can’t have.  Even if they gave you Kandi’s monologue, you woulda blown that one too sweetie.

Ms. NeNe met with the person who wrote co-authored her book.  Have any of you read it?  Is it worth the money?

Sheree is meeting with a man who’s gonna create a portrait of her that will be displayed in life size at her party, natch.  The woman is a textbook narcissist!  Bitch, if you didn’t want to wear the purple top, them why the fuck did you bring it with you?  This broad creates friction where there doesn’t have to be any!

Now that Kizzie and PAA-PAAAA are back together, she promptly headed to a jeweler to spend an obscene amount of his money on some bullshit jewelry that she said she’ll wear to the grocery store.  Wasn’t she just talking about needing to put her girls through college?  That $19,000 donkey rope is a year’s tuition boo!

Sheree brought her mother to the studio to get some free wine see what she’s working on for her party portrait.  She looked at it and said it’s “so real”.  Not surreal, but so real!  Yet she still thinks people are jealous of her…

Time for the kitty monologues.  Lisa and Kandi are both nervous as hell!  She slowed it down like the Director told her and she did well.  Up next, Kandi.  She was really wonderful!  She did it!!  I’ll give Kandi credit; she doesn’t put her name on shit unless she truly brings it!  Lord have mercy, Dwight talkin’ about he’s gonna do a “tool box” monologue!  If Dwight’s tool box could talk, I might plug my ears.

Did Kizzie just call her chunky daughter “piglet”?  Um….

It’s time for the Independence Party.  Lord, Lawrence didn’t even blend her tracks with her real hair. Oh my God in heaven, did ya’ll see what the hell Lawrence had on?  What the hell was that?  And why is Sheree driving herself to her own party?  Bitch couldn’t afford a driver for a few hours?  She is so bootleg.  No matter how hard she tries, she just ain’t fly!

Oh SHIT!  NeNe told Kim that she can’t sell the song without her.  Tell her NeNe!  I told ya’ll that shit was tacky.  She sang SIX WORDS and thought she didn’t need NeNe anymore..she now has Kandi.  NeNe was right for telling her ass off.  And Kandi’s simple simon ass is a fool.  NeNe is not pissed about the song.  It’s about how Kizzie went behind her back without saying shit to her!  That was foul and if Kandi’s perfect ass can’t see that, then she’s dumber than I thought when I found out she was marrying a nigga with 6 kids and 4 baby mamas!

Aight, the unveiling of Sheree’s portrait.  NeNe and Lisa wanted to laugh, but held it together. 

O M G, WHAT was that thang on stage naked dancing for Sheree?  And this is supposed to be a party for women.  Why is Lawrence is there?  He can dress like a woman all he wants, but yo ass still has a dick, PERIOD! 

NeNe let Kandi know!  I gotta give this one to NeNe!  Kandi is just not that smart.  How can she not see what NeNe was saying?  And Sheree, the party was not fabulous.  The best thing to happen to that boring ass party Kizzie, NeNe and Kandi fighting.  Hell, I was bored recapping this bullshit ass episode!

Next week Kizzie further sinks her claws into Kandi by throwing a joint birthday party with her!  When Kizzie burns that ass, Kandi betta not say shit to NeNe cuz she was forewarned.

…in a minute

Comments on: "Real Housewives of Atlanta: S2 Episode 9" (12)

  1. PATRICIA COOK said:


  2. I am rolling on the floor laughing my stomach hurts just reading this.! Tell it!

  3. @Patricia – How well can she be taking care of her kids when she said she’s basically broke, raising them alone yet spends her time and money doing photo shoots and throwing parties she can’t afford? Just askin…

    – Vine

  4. I gotta disagree about the Nene Kandi fight. That song would have been shit with or without Nene. She ain’t nobody. Talking about they would throw a parade for her in Athens. Pah-leeze. Someone needs to smack that chick down a peg. Kandi will learn but you can’t trust what any of those chicks say so I don’t blame her for not jumping on their crazy wagon. She should have stayed out of it but I think she was fed up with Nene’s bitchassness. Hell half the time I’m cussing at the tv cause her stupid ass.

  5. And Kim is a straight gold-digger. Horrible example for those little girls. Who she is never with. If you follow her on twitter she is always away talking about she misses her kids. She don’t care about nobody but herself.

  6. @Tai – We have to agree to disagree, but I appreciate your thoughts. Now, I am with you on Kim! She is a mess and a half. Yeah, we follow her on Twitter and she is NEVER with her damn girls. EVA!!

  7. As usual,your blog was more entertaining than this week’s episode. This week reached a new level of dullness.
    Kim: We know she is out there, but the kids mingling with the married man. come on. and she does not do anything without the help of the assistant or the nanny. And singing six words does not make you a singing star. Sheryl Crow is not worried about competion from the likes of Kim.
    NeNe: NeNe was shut out of the song. However, she used it as a reason to lash out a Kim and Kandi publicly. Coulda been done better.
    Sheree: I was dying when her momma said the picture captured her innocence! I mean maybe when she was having her never seen on the show first baby at age 15, she looked innocent. According to the She-Ra, Her independence was a bigger deal than the bi-centenial.
    Kandi: She showed talent at the Vajayjay show, but NeNe was correct about the song.
    Lisa seemed jealous about Kandi’s talent at the rehearsal, but then performed her monologue well.
    Enjoy your week girls!
    Thanks for the laughs~!

  8. Here we go, H&V…..

    First of all, lets talk about Sheree. I really can’t stand this bitch. She walks around like she’s Queen Liz or some-damn-body! Independence party?!? Honey, an independence party should be thrown for someone who is INDEPENDENT!!!! Not someone who is sitting around, waiting to get some dollars from their ex-husband. I just wanna do her like that first party planner did her…. LET HER KNOW HOW WACK SHE REALLY IS!!! And her party was some shit!

    Kim….. oh lawd! She’s another bitch I can’t stand. So now, Big Papa is back, huh? yea ok. His ass will run off again as soon as she starts talking that ‘I want a ring’ business. That man isn’t getting a divorce to be with your money hungry, gold diggin ass! Like Nene said, CLOSE YOUR LEGS TO MARRIED MEN! And definately don’t have him around your kids……. Such a slut!

    And last but not least, I have GOT to touch on this argument at the party. Now, I like Nene. She’s my favorite but this shit here…. this was just ridiculous to me! I understand that she didn’t like the way Kim went about doing things (cuz neither did I) but to say something like ‘you cant sell the song without me’?!? That sounds kinda pompous and arrogant to me. I thought her whole attitude about it was just UGLY. Granted, we all know how loud and standout-ish Nene can be but for real, who the hell cares if Kim doesn’t want you on the song?!? F*ck her! Her shit will flop anyway…. I just thought it was unnecessary to go off like she did (it just looked like she’s was doing it for tv) …. personally, I wouldnt have gave a f*ck!

    Now about Kandi gettin into the mix, she should have just stayed out of it. That argument was between the two of them. Kandi has already heard about the drama between Kim and the rest of the ladies. If she chooses to see for herself what type of person Kim is then fine! But let her fight her own damn battles. Kandi’s concern shouldnt extend beyond the studio when it comes to this “tardy for the party” mess if you ask me. Whoever steps into the booth is who you will be working with…. PERIOD!

    Sorry H&V. Havent been commenting all season so I had to let it out! Keep on keepin it real boos! Luv y’all to death!!!

  9. Damn, you said everything I’m saying while watching RHOA! Can I be your best friend? ROTFLMAO!!!!

  10. ShoreLady said:

    nigga with 6 kids and 4 baby mamas DEAD!!

    The Atlanta Police Department has confirmed that AJ Jewell, most known as the fiance of RHOA Kandi Burruss died late Friday night from a serious head injury received during an altercation at the Body Tap strip club in Atlanta.


    Wonder what’s gonna happen with AJ’s 2 daughters that Kandi’s been taking care of?

  11. Fumi said “Damn, you said everything I’m saying while watching RHOA! Can I be your best friend? ROTFLMAO!!!!”…No! – Hollywood

  12. @ShoreLady WHAT THE FUCK? Girl, we had no idea till reading the link you sent. Wow, this is crazy! Life is far too short. All those poor kids now with no father and probably no father figure! Niggas need to learn to walk away AND stop kickin it at spots with elements. Yes, elements! – Vine

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