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Posts tagged ‘Ed Hartwell’

Real Housewives of Atlanta: S2 Finale

Does Dwight have a wave nouveau?  I mean for real.  Sheree is forever talking about the who’s who of Atlanta.  We heard you the first season, damn.  “Her imagination is not connecting”!  Dwight is hilarious. 

Lisa, you’re “allowing” your husband to take charge?  Allowing?  With that attitude we’ll be seeing her 3rd husband by season 3!  Ed is trying to tell her what’s right and she’s too busy wantin’ to floss!  Bitch, you can’t afford to floss.  Move into a smaller house that Ed already owns and call it a fucking day.  Tryna go broke to keep up appearances.  Dumb ass.

NeNe sat her family down and told them about Allen, her biological father.  Gregg does not seem pleased.  He is such a good man.  “My job is to protect you.  I don’t take my job lightly”.  What is not to love about that man?  We don’t totally feel NeNe because we both know who our fathers are, but we can empathize with her wanting to know her dad.  On the other hand, Gregg is right, too!  That is his wife.  He’s been there for her when this jive muthafucka Allen knew good and hell well he was her father but didn’t step up to the plate until now!  Fuck that – he doesn’t wanna see her shed tears, yet again, behind this situation.

Over at NeNe’s, she’s filling Lisa in on the Gregg/Allen issue.  Lisa actually gave her good advice.  Don’t go sneaking behind that man’s back because of that greazzzzy ass Allen. 

Kandi and AJ with all those damn kids look like they’re at the last supper.  Kandi’s mama wasn’t slick.  She laid off AJ because that wasn’t working!  She put in enough work at deterring Kandi that she knew eventually Kandi would see the light…which she did.

Does anyone else realize that Kizzie has a drinking problem?  I’m not judging her…just sayin.  How does she figure that she no longer needs sexy clothing because she’s “engaged”?  Girl please!  That man doesn’t want you walkin around lookin like an old maid.  if that were the case, he’d be faithful to his wife!  That broads shoes are killin’ em though!  What Kim fails to understand is that NeNe doesn’t give a fuck about that damn song.  It’s the way she went behind her back about it.  Guess that would be hard to see if you’re hella narcissistic!

OMG Dwight has two thrones in his home LOL!  Aight, Kim’s giving her version of the fight to Kandi while NeNe is giving Dwight her version.  Needless to say, we believe NeNe all day EVERYday!  Kim is a muthafuckin liar!  She knows good and hell well that if NeNe had choked her without being touched first, she would’ve filed charges!  NeNe ain’t in jail cuz she didn’t do shit wrong.  I wish that bitch would put hands on me!  I’d choke her ass too!

She by Dwight Sheree is preparing for the fashion show.  If this nigga ain’t clean, I don’t know who is!  Dwight is doing IT!  Here comes Sheree looking like a hostess at PF Changs.  This fool is tryna pull a make up artist off of a model to do her…WAIT, NOW SHE WANTS TO LEAVE TO GET HER HAIR DONE???  What the fuck is wrong with Sheree?  Seriously, she is not playing with a full deck.  Why wouldn’t you get your fucking hair done before three hours BEFORE your “baby”?  She’s a joke.  Bravo TV, please fire this broad!

Over at Kim’s whore house, NeNe is once again tryna be the bigger person with this crazy bitch…to no avail.  Kim LOOKS like she’s lying.  NeNe might be a lot of things, but she didn’t put her hands on Kizzie out the clear blue sky.  Is your wig squeezin’ your brain too tight HEFFA?  Did NeNe just levitate out her seat?  She’s out!  Bitch please LOL!  How can ya’ll not love her?

Kandi is so bootsy.  Who the hell still uses chair covers in the 21st century?

Thank you, Dwight.  Hook up Sheree’s mane and call it a night.  Lisa looks good in that dress, but her accessories look like snakes around her neck.  NeNe never half steps.  Kandi’s BAMA and has some nerve talkin’ about good thang NeNe don’t get paid to think.  Kim is steadily sayin something about NeNe and her negative energy yet she won’t get her name out her mouth!  Make up your mind.  Kandi is about as fake as they come.  She has no history with Kim.  Why is she so tight with her?  What’s in it for her ass?  She is not hardly as innocent as all of her newfound bandwagon jumpers think she is!

Here’s what I want to know about She by Sheree.  How did her line shown at the W in Atlanta look better thn the bullshit she showed at damn New York Fashion Week?  Just sayin…

And now for the so called updates:

Sheree is now working on a line of exercise videos LOL!  Really?!  Really Sheree?  Not a single update bout She by Sheree being carried in department stores, boutiques or online.  Is her website even up yet?  Weak.

Lisa nd Ed are co-authoring a parenting book?  SMH.  Listen, nobody wants to buy a book allegedly written by a former NFL player and his wife unless you’re going to tell groupies how to get pregnant by a ball player.  Just keepin’ it real.  Oh yeah, Lisa’s still not pregnant because she’s going through the change.

Kuntry Kandi – we know her story

Kizzie – we know her story, too…OH, she and Big Papa are no longer together.

DAMNIT, tivo didn’t record NeNe’s update.  What did it say ya’ll?

Another season has come to an end.  I know, I know, but we’ll always have the reunions shows AND Orange County starting soon.  Tell us your thoughts on Season 2.

…Vine…in a minute

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Real Housewives of Atlanta: S2 Episode 11

It’s not as fun watching alone without Hollywood, but fuck it.  The show must go own!

Okay, am I the only one who has a moment every time Kandi does the prep in the intro?  Moving on…

Batting lead off is Kim shopping with Kandi.  I hope bitch apologizes for missing her performance.  She ain’t right.  Oh shit, she wants to put off her absence on her kid being sick!  That nappy headed nanny is the one raising those kids, not Kizzie.  Let’s be honest.  Kizzie, how do you “decide” that you love someone?  Is she crazy?  

Over to Lisa and NeNe’s asses.  What abuse did Lisa endure?  She plays the perfect, flawless life role.  Who abused her?  Not being funny; just asking.  NeNe is back to wondering who her biological father is.  Lord, can ya’ll imagine who her daddy is based on seeing her ass in motion?  He must be a COLD PIECE!

Lisa making the rounds tryna stay relevant.  Now she’s at Kandi’s house.  Her clothing line is doing well supposedly and Ed wants to get back on the field.  Well nigga shit, you done, sorry!  Let that shit go.  Find another way to be in the NFL mix.  He can’t be any worse than Rodney Harrison talking about the “PITCHBIRD” Steelers! 

Oh gawd, over to Sheree and her promo video shoot!  She needs to lay this clothing line to rest already.  NOBODY wants to wear her clothes.  I’d rather walk around with Apple Bottom Jeans on than some Sheree shit.  How is she gonna clown Lisa and say she’s not average when EVERYTHING about her ass is average and has been since she met Bob in that fucking bucket?  Keep it all the way real Sheree?  You ain’t fly.  You came up; leave it at that!

Ed needs to give up his hoop (field) dreams and try to find a job commentating.  Nigga you done.  I’m sorry to say, but you are.  Stop letting your dick ego run you and find another way to fool with pro football.  On the field ain’t gone happen.  He still wanna play in the league.  You and everyone else.  You better find some pick up flag football games to get into!  Why are we even discussing this in season 2 of this show?  Ed was done last season.  He confirmed it this season when he was driving around in that SUV on stock!  It’s been time to hang up the cleats.  Nobody has picked you up in 2 seasons.  He acting like it’s his damn choice! 

She by Sheree is NOT classy nor elegant!  What is this bitch smoking?  She needs to listen to Dwight and let that bootleg shit be what it is!  And what it is is NOT elegant or classy!  She feels like Dwight is overbearing because she’s hella janky!  If it were up to her, she’d have yet another fashion show without fashion!  Her diva attitude is going to give her a jacked up clothing line like Eve…keep own.

Kandi is yappin about her new album.  NEXT…

OMG NeNe’s race is on the way.  Dwight looks like a hungry Ethiopian trying on clothes at Forever 21 during their first visit to the United States.  Lord have mercy, I need to go to church on Sundee.  NeNe’s gay friend from L.A. makes a better woman than he does a man!  Do ya’ll see this shit?  For real, I am not joking.  I can’t believe I’m watching this GNR!  You see that Ed did NOT partake in this bullshit!

How did a MAN win a race running in high heels!

Aight, so Lisa’s about to take a pregnancy test while Ed waits.  Damn, she’s not pregnant.  Poor Ed looked hella depressed.

What did everyone think of this episode?

…Vine…in a minute

Real Housewives of Atlanta: S2 Episode 2

Just laughing at the opening.  Kim said “In Atlanta, money and class give you power”.  Then I guess she has zero power in the Atl.

Sheree is so pretentious, talkin about she and her friend Tania are both married or dating professional athletes.  Isn’t Sheree single though?  Now that Anthony dropped her ass, she ain’t having her Coming to America party.  She’s going for something small now.  Give it up!

Oh Lord, Ed is STILL talking about returning to the NFL.  As if it’s his decision.  Of course Lisa’s gonna be more supportive of him this season because there’s no chance that his ass will be back in the league.  But if someone picks him up and KEEPS HIM, I wish him luck.

NeNe, being the bigger woman that she is, called Kim and asked to meet so they could put the bullshit behind em.  We’ll see how this works out.

Kim knows she’s a damn liar talkin’ about she was never with Big Papa for his money.  We ALL saw that short, ugly man!  We know better.  Now I will give Kim props for wanting to return overpriced bullshit to stores now that her human atm isn’t in her life.  Maybe Sheree shoulda kept kickin’ it with her cuz she has a little bit of sense.  She might not can sing, but she knows that she don’t wanna spend till she goes broke!

Why is Kandi even reading fucking blogs?  She should know better than that!  We rarely have warm and fuzzy thoughts about celebrities.  Why does she care?

Sheree, here’s a tip.  If you feel like you might not be safe in your new home and/or remote area, don’t get on national tv and describe the isolated area you now live in dumbass!  What is wrong with her?  I could find her house based on her description alone.  So instead of using common sense, she’s at a gun range with her friend, Tania.  This bitch tryna point the gun upward.  Did ya’ll see how fast Tania took that shit from her like “bitch you ain’t killin my ass on national tv!”  And what the fuck was Sheree wearing?  How are you a designer, but can’t style yourself?

Over at the cantina with Kim and NeNe.  They kept it real with each other.  I gotta admit, I did enjoy watching the two of them and their friendship rekindling!  They are a lot of fun and even though they dislike each other again, I think that they really do like each other a lot deep down.  If they weren’t on this damn show, I’m sure they’d be fine.  NeNe looked drunk as a Ned the Wino by the end of the scene.  Loves it!

I’ll say it again…KANDI, LISTEN TO YO MAMA!!!!

Over at the fertility doctor, Lisa and Ed are talking about how tough it might be if her old ass has another kid.  Ed is a clown.  Of course nobody thinks they are going to have issues when having a kid over 35, but it’s a reality.  Be thankful for the blessing ya’ll have with the one you have and keep it moving. 

Kandi over at her mama’s house lookin’ like one of the Good Girls in that plaid skirt.  And what is an “unt”?  Just asking.  OMG, this nigga has FOUR baby mamas?  FOUR?  Kandi, come on now girl.  I’m being for real.   That is too much!  Too much!!  Her “unts” can talk about how if it doesn’t work, it doesn’t work, but they don’t have Kandi’s money or Kandi’s daughter either!!  I just don’t get why people walk into situations like this…inviting potential drama into their lives.

Over at Lisa, her sucka for love ass husband is making a romantic dinner for her.  Did ya’ll hear this man say “Chili-N” sea bass?  Dead…Chili-N!!!  If you can’t pronounce it, then you shouldn’t be eating OR cooking it!  OMG, he’s killing me.  “Vinegarette”!  Make the laughter stop, please!  Vinegarette!

Wooo Jazze Pha is a big one! 

Time for Sheree, Kim and NeNe to get together.  What the hell does Sheree think when she’s getting dressed to walk out the house?  She always looks a mess.  Kim with that helmet in case they tried to hurt her was fucking funny!  Seriously, I think that Kim was telling the truth.  She even admitted that she said Sheree was bouncing checks at Neiman Marcus for buying shoes ROFL!  Why lie about some other stuff and not that.  I think Sheree is full of shit!  How she gone call Kim trailer trash when Kim had money long before Sheree came up on Bob?  We done already told ya’ll how Sheree was rollin’ before Bob started fucking with her.  Now she wants to act like she invented the word class.  Bitch please!

Vine…in a minute

Lisa Hartwell, is foreclosure the new black?

“If it doesn’t make me money, I don’t do it!”  Ya’ll know that’s Lisa Hartwell’s show opener on the Real Housewives of Atlanta, right.  So, did going into foreclosure become a new way to make money when you’re the homeowner?  I’m just askin…

According to papers obtained by TMZ, Lisa and Ed Hartwell’s Georgia mansion went into foreclosure and has already been resold by the bank.  Lisa and Ed are reportedly settled into a new home that they “own”.

Lisa fired back Tuesday morning on Twitter saying:

“Ppl hear or read what they want to hear or see. We were Not booted from our home nor are we living under a bridge lmao! Thanks 4 the sppt.”

I have one word…semantics!  I’m sure they weren’t booted.  They probably moved out before they had to. 

Listen, this is why we were so tough on Lisa during Season 1.  Just keep it real.  Foreclosures happen to many people for many reasons.  Whatever reason the bank took her home and sold it for far less than the loan amount, this could be a good way that Lisa, as a realtor, can educate others.  But no, she’s too busy concerned with keeping up this baller, shot caller image@@  Please girl.  Ed driving that Armada and lookin’ like he ain’t had a haircut since the season 1 finale ruined that honey!

I won’t even get on her being a realtor…I can’t.  It’s too early!

…in a minute…Vine

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Real Housewives of Atlanta: Season Finale Wrap-Up

Grab somethin’ to drank and get comfy because we’re going to be a minute after tonight’s finale!!

Sheree, WHY are your face and your neck two totally different colors?  It’s not that fucking hard.  Take your ass to a damn make-up counter at Lenox and get the right fucking foundation for your skin tone.  That shit annoys the fuck out of us every week, but we digress.  This bitch said that something is wrong with NeNe because she has to pull other people down to make herself look better.  But in the next breath this fake ass broad says that NeNe is ignorant and she does not hang around ignorant people.  Correct us if we’re wrong, but wasn’t that putting NeNe down to make herself look better?  And Sheree sweetie, if you’re going to call someone else ignorant, Hollywood and Vine suggest that you first understand the difference between “ask” and “axe”.  Sheree, if you “axe” somebody, then your wrong color foundation wearing ass would be in jail.  Whew, Sheree is a muthafucka ain’t she…naming her damn son Kairo with a “K”!  She’s as bad as Kim’s K-A-T spellin’ ass.

There are so many words that come to mind when thinking about Kim Zolciak, but after tonight’s show the ones that stick out the most are…BAD WIG!  Who told this bitch it was cute to have a platinum blond wig and her dyed blond hair in the front with her dark roots showing?  You’re walking around with a 3 carat canary yellow diamond ring on and writin’ checks for $68,000, but you can’t match up the color of your wig to your real muthafuckin’ hair?  Raggedy ass bitch!  This 2 dolla hoe had the NERVE to say that NeNe looks like a drag queen??  Has she looked in the mirror lately.  Shit, say what you want, but NeNe looked like her body used to be tough a few years ago!  Kim really threw her kids into the mix to keep from going toe to toe with NeNe at the dinner didn’t she?  She’s such a good mother.  So good that she smokes cigarettes right in front of her children.  Nothing like passing down lung cancer and heart disease to your offspring.  Speaking of passing down, did Hollywood and Vine hear Kim right?  Did she really say that her voice is a “God given talent”?  Someone with tivo or dvr tell us that we heard her wrong because that ‘voice’ ain’t got shit to do with God!  Not ONE thing!  But before we move on to Lisa, we would be wrong if we didn’t acknowledge the mockery that Kim made of some poor designer’s creation!  She looked like one of the Mary Jane Girls!  Hustler wouldn’t even let her pose for them looking like that!  Lookin’ like Owen Wilson with a bad wig on. 

Lisa was wrong for a few things tonight.  One, why is she constantly lying to Kim telling her how beautiful she looks and shit?  No, she did not look good!  Keep it real with this bitch.  False encouragement like that is why this bitch thinks singing is her God given talent.  Two, laughing at Kim’s ‘NeNe is a drag queen’ comment was wrong.  Come on now Lisa.  If you’re so above the drama, then you shouldn’t have even been a part of that shit, let alone laughing at NeNe!  That was fucked up, period!  Now, Lisa has been a groupie, we mean married, for long enough to know that NFL contracts are not guaranteed.  WHY would you announce to everyone that your man was picked up by the Raiders before this nigga even stepped on the field at training camp?  She had to have known better than that!  We can’t imagine how fucking embarrassed Ed‘s ass must be now that everyone knows he got cut from the team!  Hollywood and Vine think that Lisa did that shit on purpose…sort of like a controlling man in a relationship!  Break down his self esteem so you can keep that man under your thumb!  And did ya’ll hear her say that she wanted to “prepare” a toast for her husband?  Ummm, boo, the time to ‘prepare’  a toast is before you leave the house.  Standing in front of a room full of people with a glass in your hand would be the time to ‘propose’ a toast!  Lastly, Lisa, you need to stop trying to make grown ass muthafuckas be friends!  Everybody can’t be friends – she’s lucky that it didn’t go down at dinner with all the kids there!  Stop trying to play peacemaker and mind your damn business!  

Again, Hollywood and Vine find it hard to say anything but positives about DeShawn.  We thought she and Eric were cute tonight; still respectful and in love.  If only she’d stop talking through her teeth.  We’re just sayin’…We’re very glad that they prepared for when his career and “conTRACK”  came to an end!

Last but certainly not least is our girl, NeNe!  We love this bitch!  Yeah, NeNe is ghetto and loud as fuck, but at least she is herself!  How can you not respect that?  She didn’t let her son act a fool (other than that Nike earring) when it came to getting his first car.  She sounded like a normal mom wanting her baby to be in something safe.  We’re glad she called Kim out at the dinner; she deserved it!  Gregg Leakes is one of the coolest old niggas on Earth!  Ed seemed to be really listening to his words of wisdom.  Not Eric’s ass LOL!  Eric was lookin’ like ‘is this old muthafucka for real’!! 

This season finale was anticlimactic because the real shit is going down next week during the reunion special!  Until then, let Hollywood and Vine know your thoughts on the finale.

In a minute…

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