We’re “live” with Lala hosting, of course! As she puts it, we’re here to see if Ray and Cocktail still have the magic from when they finished the show…you know, the magic that can only be found in Vegas drunk and off ‘E’…allegedly!
First up, Stilts. Ray said he don’t date married women. So, maybe he wasn’t fucking Whitney Houston?! Stilts is in the hot seat. She looks decent. She clowned the shit outta Ray talkin’ bout he can stand on a table to be her height. Love it. I mean, yeah she was faulty for goin’ on a dating show while being married, BUT Ray ain’t much better cuz his shit is dirty, too! Notice he laughed when Stilts called his ass out! He didn’t say one more word to her ass! Someone get him a booster seat please!
Caviar is up! She looks like she got a little thick in the middle since she got kicked off the show. WHO dressed LaLa in that ill-fitting yellow dress! Please show us Chicago Larry! I’ve been waitin’ to see this ugly nigga ALL DAY! OH MY GOD! OH MY GAWD! This is one of the oldest, ugliest niggas I done EVA seen! Aight, Ray is crazy! HE was the one on the show talkin’ about how fabulous and well-known Chicago Larry was and shit. Now all of a sudden he’s sayin’ Chicago Larry’s popularity was boosted by him being on the show. Well which fucking one is it?
Chardonnay is back! She got a new weave and she looks great! Let’s see how Ray is gonna clean this up when she gets in the hot seat! Chardonnay looks better than LaLa and she ain’t had baby the first by a multi-millionaire! LaLa got her crying and shit over this munchkin! Poor baby. Ray looked like he KNEW he picked the wrong one. THAT is how you come back when you got dumped!
Danger’s crazy/deranged ass is next! Do ya’ll hear the music in the background? Danger looks a hot ass mess! WHO put that wig on Unique’s head. OH MY GAWD. Unique just busted her out that she’s a ho! A straight up prostitute! She tried to put her craziness off on being from the Bay. Bullshit! Bitch is a lunatic. That has shit to do with being from the Bay Area.
Uniqua is up next! She didn’t wanna box earlier in the season cuz she didn’t wanna look a fool. Well what the fuck is she doing now on the show? Who combed her hair? Obviously nobody! Ray lookin’ like he’s GLAD he didn’t pick her ass! She looks a mess. I hope Cashmere calls her fuckin’ ass out. Ya’ll KNOW that shit pissed me off! Other than those ugly blue shoes, Cashmere looks good, too! OHHHH, she just called Uniqua bi-sexual! We all saw that broad sitting and enjoying lap dances from Feisty and Chardonnay! Own it bisexual girl, own it!
LaLa is talkin’ about taking a look back at Ray and Cocktail’s journey…like they fell in love or somethin’! WHY THE HELL DOES SHE LOOK LIKE THAT? The sistas in the audience laughin’ at this broad. She looks like she got that dress from Mervyns! Just cheap and bootleg. Chardonnay is a stripper and looked better than her ass! How you gone look WORSE than the broads you beat out!
Wait, Caviar had to lean over and ask someone what the fuck LaLa asked! This shit is hilarious.
Cocktail done professed her love to Ray. He just sat there looking at the camera. Ray said he wants to get to know more about her..Yeah, does she like Doggy Style or Missionary? Role play or S&M!
He’s going to use her ass up, literally, then throw her back to West Sacramento to that dining room-LESS house! He’ll be done in time for Season 2 to start filming. They already cast for the shit.
What did ya’ll think of the reunion?
…in a minute